Changing My Mind (Again)

Shock horror.

I might have changed my mind as to what direction I see this project going in.

I am aware that I've said this about 13 times already during this brief but I'm confident that this is the last time. I've been doing a bit of soul searching about what I want to portray during this project, AND although I am so happy with the images from the last blog of the shadowy figures looming over people, and its different to my usual stuff and I know its good to branch out. I cant help thinking that the main thing that came out of the feedback session was that everybody really liked the idea of playing with the mundane-ity of the 'haunted York attractions'. This is still something that I'm really keen to look at in my work as it really fits the sense of humour that seems to come through in a bit of my work, and I see no way to incorporate the mundane haunted locations into the darker, shadowy work I've been doing. It just doesn't make sense and in trying to combine the two I think it makes it glaringly obvious that I wasn't settled on one idea in particular. I also think the less spooky stuff has more of a narrative to it, looking at the way haunted locations in York are being exploited to make money, which is easier to understand without the use of text so will make for a better picture book. 

So now:

My plan is to go full speed ahead with the mundane haunted York idea, and start working out which locations I can use, and what kind of structure the book might start to take. When I was sketching today, I got really caught up with trying to make a ghost character that didn't look too typical e.g. too cute or like a wannabee sad ghost club ghost, that I could fit into my book. I think I might have cracked it. I want my ghost to look just as worn out as I felt being around all those people trying to make money out of 'haunted' attractions, so currently, my ghost is a little bit chubby and sad looking. 

my initial ghost character sketches

Narrowed down to the best three

Narrowed down to this little guy

Whilst I was out the other day I had a brain wave that maybe my book could follow a little ghost, whose really jaded and dis-illusioned from having to live as a ghost for so long. Who takes a little trip to York, to try and find some ghost friends but he doesn't see any ghosts, and no one can see him so he's really lonely. He even goes on a ghost walk to try to find more of his kind. Then maybe at the end he scares a child or something and realises how satisfying being a scary ghost can be? 

This is what happens when I have good ideas while I don't have a notepad near me

I don't know this is all just rambling now and I'm starting to sound insane so I'll leave it here. But either way I'm more excited about this project now I've had some time to sit down with it and think properly about which direction is the best for it. My head feels a lot clearer, even though I definitely haven't articulated it that well in this blog! But don't worry, dyslexia tests on January the 4th so hopefully I can get some help on my blog writing skills.

but for now, this is how I'm coping with things

Finished!

The deed is finally done! I'm actually so pleased with how this has turned out, even though this one has taken a long time.

What went well? 

• First of all... I USED POLYMER CLAY! and it didn't go horrendously wrong. I thought at least somewhere along the line it would whether it was modelling it or photographing it or even setting it in the oven. 
• The food looks more realistic than I'd thought it would but still whimsical enough to not just look like real actual size food. And the fact that its such extravagant and elaborate food makes the picture look even more bizarre, I look like I'm at a mad-hatters tea party which is kind of the vibe I was going for.
• The paper cut out of me doesn't look awful! I didn't have any cardboard to stiffen it with but actually you cant tell in the picture, its turned out the right size for the table and everything else as well after only a bit of trial and error
• I think all in all, I communicated a pretty strong sense of narrative using a photographic image, which is some thing I don't specialise in, I mean this was taken on my Iphone which is a true mark of exactly how often I use photography... The combination of found items like the table, chairs and old dolls, the handmade food and the printed photo look a bit mis-matched but I think that adds to the unsettling element of the image and makes you look a bit closer to figure out whats happening. Something that always appeals to me is an image where lots is going on and you have to pay close attention to pick it all apart and appreciate different parts of it, like those puzzle images that every time you look at them you notice something new? If I can get close to replicating something like that then I'm chuffed.

What could have been improved?

• MY TIME MANAGEMENT- as bloody always, I spent way too long getting stuck into this because I was so worried it wouldn't be as good as everyone else's, and neglected a few other bits of work in the process which I now have to catch up with. 
• Similar to the point above, I know I've probably over complicated this project and this image and there will be other people that spent way less time making things but their images might be just as or more effective than mine. That is a fault of mine that I'm beginning to recognise, I think its in my nature to try too hard at making things look complex, whether this is actually a good thing or totally bad I haven't yet worked out. But part of me thinks that's what makes me unique? Or maybe I'm just telling myself that to make myself feel better.

Polymer Clay Injuries

First of all let me just say, moulding with polymer clay is bloody hard work on your hands. But at least I know that for next time, maybe in future I shouldn't roll it all out with just my hands? 

BUT- I'm finished moulding my tiny foods! 

Theres so many now! I had to make a few more than I'd planned as the few that I had didn't fill the table up completely. I don't know what to do with them all now... Next step is to photograph myself and then print it out. Feeling challenged but very rewarded.

Planning For 3D Image

Yesterday and today has been spent planning for the photographic image with some kind of 3D element, because its been clouding up my head for a while now. I think its the kind of thing I wouldn't usually even consider doing so I'm pretty sure thats why I've been putting it off for so long, but with things like this its always best to just get stuck into it and hope you get more excited about it as the project goes along I think. 

I wanted to do something that reflected one of the main parts of my personality, and I had a little brainstorm to try and think what my biggest traits in life were and the obvious things came up like sloths, and food. So this time I decided to focus on food as its something I'm not as openly passionate about as sloths. At first I thought about just doing a bit of camera trickery and putting a massive cake close to the camera and standing behind it with my arms out to make it look like my body was the cake. 

However

I'm quite limited as to what I can do with the camera work because the only thing I have to work with is my phone camera :(. Therefore whatever I decided on needed to be on quite a small scale to be photographed well. So I thought about the fact that all my friends say I should be a competitive eater and that theres so many types of foods I'm obsessed with. 

My plan: 
OK so I'm planning to have a cutout of me sitting at a dolls table with lots of crazy, tiny food on the table and maybe some part guests and decorations? I also obviously wanted it to look super weird to reflect my personality. I was lucky enough to find a dolls table and chair set that my Great Grandad made years ago, in the loft, as well as a ridiculously creepy doll that went with it (bonus). I also thought this idea was one of the most playful and fun, which not only reflects my personality and way of thinking (I hope?) but also seems to be a running theme throughout the work I'm creating. I'm quite happy with this because personally I'm always more drawn to work with a playful element to it, maybe I see it as a form of escapism?

Polymer Clay:
To make the food I knew I'd have to get it to quite a small scale but also have a range of colours to make it look realistic, and having already used air-dry grey clay to make some figurines before, decided that wasn't the way to go. This is a project that needs to be completed quite quickly as theres so much else going on so polymer clay is so much better as it drys so quickly, and is already coloured so doesn't need painting. Its so easy to work with I don't know why I've not used it before, but I'll for sure use it again, however I am aware that it requires a high level of craft which might take me a few days to master. For me the spaghetti and meatballs were the most satisfying to make because, well, look at them. SO TINY. And theres something so satisfying in the fact that they're so instantly recognisable as meatballs and spaghetti even though they're not!

Wooden chairs, doll and friends

Teeny tiny food

Next: 

Next step is to fill the table with more food, or possibly plates and cutlery and things just to make the table look a bit more exciting. Then I'm going to dress the scene, with tiny paper decorations and find a nice setting for it, with good light! Then I also need to photograph myself and print it out to scale. 

Playing With Ghosts

For literally the entirety of yesterday and the day before, I've just been using my sketchbook to play around with any ideas I had in my head or that were written on the feedback sheet from our group tutorial. Honesty I've had SO much fun doing this, just getting stuck into the subject of ghosts and using different materials instead of just sketching and fine liner. I'm finally starting to realise the value of letting the materials you're using dictate the theme of the images you make. 

My hands hurt now.

But its been really worth it! The most successful experiments in my opinion have been the two studies of spooky places in York, done in watercolour pencil, ink and water. I think because I consciously was trying to make an effort to portray the moodiness and creepy feel these places have in real life, this is reflected in the images and they've turned out very different to the happy-go-lucky images I usually churn out. 

I also really like the fine liner drawn images with ghostly shadows layered on top in charcoal. Again I think the reason for me favouring these is that they're such a far cry from my usual style and its pleasing for me to see that even if I'm not working in the style I'm comfortable working in, I can still make powerful pictures. 

Next:
Next I seriously need to work out which route my works going to head down because I thought I wanted to make it really jovial and lighthearted but now I've trialled some different styles in my sketchbook, I think the darker style stuff has a bit more weight to it? I think the best course of action might be to mock up a few scenes in a comic style and a few in the more sinister one, then show them around to people to see which go down best?

Mundane setting number 1

Mundane setting number 2

Some of my spookier settings

Hiding some ghosts

Hiding more ghosts

Spooky feels

Zine And Feedback

For our big group crit on Friday we all made a little zine kind of outlining our intentions and findings from the research. I'll be honest, while doing this I hit a bit of a wall, I really didn't know what I wanted to do with all this research now I had it, my natural instinct would be to come up with some kind of narrative to do with what I'd seen, especially as we know that the end product of this brief is a picture book. But I'm really trying hard to push myself to not just rush this project and let myself get carried away with the first idea I settle on (pick the easiest option). I'm really trying hard to let the process dictate what kind of project this turns into. 

My zine:
In my zine, although I used a range of materials, the outcomes of the images were all quite similar, delicate images of streets in York, and tiny little ghosts scattered about. I have to say, even though its my work, even I think its a bit boring. And you can tell I've been heavily influenced by The Sad Ghost Club which is cool but makes me worry its not original enough. 

My feedback:
Although a lot of the feedback I received was very positive, I used received a massive amount of critical (in a good way) feedback. Some one suggested playing up the mundanity of the scenes, like the ghosts in Greggs I'd planned to do, someone also suggested hiding the ghost within items in the scene which is an idea I really liked and isn't something I've ever tried to do before so I'll trial that in my sketchbook. And then someone else mentioned making a little 3d set to have the ghost walking through and photograph it to make the images for the book. They also suggested using a tampon for the ghost character which I think is ACE. 

My next steps:
- decide whether I want to story to consist of a scary, realistic or mundane background
- trial different ways of portraying the backdrops and ghost, maybe adding functional elements like flaps?
- play more. Experiment with materials and don't be dictated by my usual style

Ephemera- My New Favourite Word

I collected some things on my adventures:





Bonus: You can see the lady called Claire who took us for a guided tour of the haunted cellar in The Treasurers House in the bottom right